Last minute reflections

When I get time I'm going to write a DIY-low-fi-lo-res-how-to-guide-to-making-film-with-meaning-and-content-with-no-budget-using-a-tripod-or-not manifesto. HA! I amuse myself greatly.

Video Clips

The video clip that is up now is just raw footage. I plan on putting up more videos when I have a little more time. I'm especially excited about getting my interview with architect Ted Smith online. Ted built GoHomes in San Diego in the 80's and he has a really cool and unconventional approach to architectural design. He's also a pretty cool guy.

film stills

Finding Home the story

I had the idea to make a film about home some time towards the end of 2006. I was planning a trip to Nebraska to visit my family and some remaining friends there for Christmas, and I was all set to fly out, when my flight was canceled because of a storm in Denver.

I went to the airport that morning and it was hopeless. I was desperate to get home to Nebraska for Christmas. I guess I had been depressed or something and I really felt like I needed to get the hell out of California. So, on the spur of the moment I decided to drive home by myself. A few hours later I left for a long and unanticipated drive to Nebraska.

Something happened on the drive—Maybe it happened driving through the desert. I suddenly felt a profound sense of transience, and I realized it was a feeling that I was very familiar with because I felt the same way in my day to day life in California even though I've lived here since 2001.

I realized I felt a resonating sense of homesickness, and it didn't go away once I reached Nebraska. It didn't help that I got deathly sick on the drive, and a blizzard struck Nebraska stranding me with my parents on New Year's Eve when I had other plans. Of course, my mom is totally amazing, and so I was warm and comfortable and loved, and things were pretty good, except for a sense of foreboding I had about ultimately having to resume my life in California feeling displaced from home, and generally uneasy about things: the future, home, love, relationship, work, friends.

So, that is the beginning of the story. You'll have to watch the film to find out more.

The film's premiere screening is on Saturday, November 14th, 2009 at Suture (655 10th Ave) in downtown San Diego. The event begins at 7:30PM with an acoustic performance by Jackson Milgaten, from the Vision of a Dying World, followed by the film screening and a reception.

My House

I would never be able to call San Diego home, in any way, if it weren't for Adriene and Jim, not to mention Steven, Emily, Randall, Adrian, Zach, Julie, Anita, Michael, and Trish. They are the walls of my house.

Not feeling at Home

I think my sense of homesickness does not have to do with being away from any particular place, more often it has to do with feeling alienated from the people around me, feeling lonely. We must all experience that. I often wonder about my grandpa in the last years of his life, living alone is a small isolated little town in Nebraska. It's one thing to be lonely when your young but it seems like such an injustice to be lonely when your old. I guess that's life, ultimately we go through it by ourselves, we make our homes the best we can.

Finding Home not real estate

I'm amused that findinghome.com is a real estate website. I should have guessed.

Finding Home is within sight.

It's October 27th, 2009. I'm going to write this, then go edit. I need to make a few small changes before I print the finished film to tape. I'm almost done now, but a year ago I was worried about finishing, very worried. I thought not finishing the film would kill me, good thing I'm finishing it! As for finding my home? Well, that's another story.